Kogi Truck – Newport Beach, CA
Guest writer from DBNewsWorld rolls up to the Kogi Truck!
It almost seemed like a myth to me. Who would have thought that fusing the simplicity and versatility of Mexican food with the savory flavors of Korean cuisine would be so marketable? Well, it’s extremely marketable. Almost stupidly marketable. All right, it’s not that crazy. In any case, once I learned of the truck’s existence, it was inevitable that I had to try it out. I love a tasty taco as much as the next bumbling drunk and I have never turned down the opportunity to indulge in eating any form of Korean barbequed meat. So after a long day at staring at unreasonably attractive women and avoiding rambunctious children at Disney’s California Adventure, my friends and I found ourselves craving the Southern California exclusive Kogi Truck.
Since our eatery of interest is physically a taco truck, we found ourselves in some well lit parking lot outside of The Huddle Bar and Lace & Lotion: Your One Stop Love Shop. Nothing like being drunk and potentially aroused before eating. We grabbed ourselves a couple of beers and around 10 PM we began waiting in line. Legend has it that the bus normally arrives at 10:30 PM and closes at 1 AM. My group and I were about 30th in line, but this became worse as the night progressed because people held spots for their friends. Behind us the line grew and grew like they were waiting inline for some amazing amusement park ride. 10:30 PM came and went, nothing. 11 PM, nothing.
We were tired, we were hungry, and the line became ridiculous: There were parents with their babies, bar patrons, lots of teenagers, and too many smokers for my comfort. I began to lose hope; I was starting to think it was some kind of scam, like there wasn’t such thing as a Kogi Truck. 11:15 PM and we saw its headlights, it pulled into the parking lot like some kind of mystical beast, some kind of once in a lifetime sighting of a creature too magical to be true. It was a damn taco truck. Another 15 minutes passed before the truck even opened. Talk about being on Asian time.
It would be well until midnight before my friends and I finally got to order. The place offered a couple things: tacos or burritos with Korean short rib, spicy pork, chicken, or tofu, kimchi quesadillas, and sliders (tiny hamburgers). What was lamer was that when we got to order, they “ran out” of quesadillas and burritos. Good thing I didn’t give a shit about any of those things. I ordered 2 tacos of each of the meats and an order of sliders. The group in front of my friends and me ordered a total of 40 tacos, so that didn’t help the wait. Finally, 2 hours after the waiting began, we had our food.
What the fuck? It was like eating regular tacos but much soggier. The chicken was all right while the spicy pork was unremarkable and had lots of fat. I saved the short ribs (which I heard were the best) to bring home for my cousin. The food lacked the familiar spiciness of Mexican heat, but instead had an herby Korean chili taste. The sliders were 88% mayo-caked bun.
One word, three syllables: overhyped. I was violently tempted to yell out loud to the line, which by now was unbelievably long, “I waited in line for THIS? This food taste like SHIT!” But I’m sure they didn’t care, these must have been loyalists. Or crack heads. I would later read a Yelp review that said something like “For a place that serves Korean inspired Mexican food, you won’t find a single Mexican or Korean waiting in line with you.” I think that says a lot.
